Reality

To say I am overwhelmed is an understatement. The reality of this surgery is setting in, and my lofty, lofty goal of running the Peachtree Road Race July 4th is quite hilarious. Turns out I will be lucky to be able to walk 3-4 miles in July, much less go for a 6.2 mile run through Atlanta. Let me back it up.

As I mentioned, it’s very obvious that I need surgery. I finally got the pics and you can see them here.

pic 2
the arrow points to the tear
pic 1
this one shows the bone and the tear
pic 3
a better pic of the bone. that area will be shaved off in surgery.

I finally got a call last week that my insurance was going to cover the procedure, but two of the codes the insurance doesn’t cover up front. I had to pay $1500 out of pocket. I may or may not get some of that back. Thank goodness for my tax refund (that I had not spent yet).  The surgery is now scheduled for April 9th, two weeks from today.

I was out of town for work last week and stressed and didn’t have my regular workout options so I decided to hop on the treadmill. I just needed to see how bad it still was and let out some tension. I think part of me needed to justify the surgery.

Two miles down, slow and not wonderful. They actually didn’t hurt while doing them, but I could immediately tell after I finished that I was sore. Add a four hour car ride home on Thursday and I was popping Aleve like nobody’s business.

Friday was my first pre-surgery physical therapy appointment (with a PT at the doc’s office). I quickly realized that my right hip is weak (shocker) and also learned how much I was down playing this surgery. I won’t be able to exercise for 3 months. 3!!! MONTHS. It may be shorter than that, but I am preparing myself for the worst case scenario. No pilates, no running, no elliptical, no spin, no yoga. Just PT.

I’m not going to lie, I burst into tears as soon as I got into my car.

Fast forward to Monday-my pre-op appointment. It started around 1:45 and I left around 4:30. First up, paperwork. There’s lots of technical names that go with this surgery, but I will wait and see what I actually have done and explain it all after the surgery. It’s not just “hip arthroscopy.” The packet that I was told to read ended up being LOTS of paperwork that scared the crap out of me.  I flipped the page to see warning below. I totally understand this is to prevent lawsuits from the crazys in the world, but geeze.

IMG_3230

Then, lots and lots of prescriptions. Pain pills, naseau pills and who knows what other kind of pills. I will also have to take shots (twice a day for two weeks) to keep my blood thin since I am on birth control (didn’t want to get off) and blood clots can be a risk.

IMG_3231 IMG_3232 IMG_3235

I then had to go check in with anesthesia, have blood drawn, and then final x-rays of my hip. I was exhausted.

I will have one more PT session and also meet with a home health company to give me some machine that I have to attach my leg to at home post-surgery.  I have loved ones staying with me because apparently someone will need to turn my leg (or something) and help me get to the bathroom and also make sure I don’t move my hips too much post surgery. All very, very overwhelming.

It’s been emotional. I like to be in control (hate pain meds). I am independent. I don’t like asking people to do things, I like to do them for myself. I don’t like being needy. This is all a learning experience for me and I wasn’t really prepared for what all the surgery entailed.  I think I was in denial and thought I would be back at it in no time (hence me signing up for a 10K in July). I most likely won’t be able to run for another 3-4 months and I am okay with that.

I know all of this will make me stronger in the end and will help me learn how to lean on others, but I am struggling.

Do you do well depending on others or do you like to do it yourself? Pain meds- take em or leave em? Did you get a tax refund? If so, please tell me you bought something fabulous and didn’t have to buy a hip. :)

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Elizabeth

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23 Comments

  • holy cow. that IS a lot to absorb. just think of the returns you’ll get from this year’s return: many happy years of running, spending future returns. our return + my bonus = back yard over-haul.

  • Elizabeth, So bummed to hear you’ll have to go through all of this, but glad you’ve found “the cure” to your on-going pain. Do you have a date yet for surgery?

  • What a rough day. My heart hurts for you right now sweet girl. Just know that you are doing the best thing by having surgery. My co-worker was just as devastated over it, but she is pretty much 100% now (almost 4 months post surgery). Hang in there and know that so many people care for you and are thinking about you. XXXXX

    As for the tax refund we freaking owed a couple grand. No splurging for me. Darn new tax bracket!!!!!

  • I am very very independant and have a very hard time asking others for help so I know how you feel!
    Hope all goes well with surgery and that you can get back to normal and working out again.

  • Ugh, friend. I don’t know what to say except that this sucks. A year from now, this will be just a small blip on your radar and you will be running strong and pain free. Take it one day at a time and just keep reminding yourself why you are doing it. And call me if you want to vent. Anytime.

  • Tax refund? ha ha ha ha ha. HELL no, didn’t get one of those!

    I didn’t take many pain meds after giving birth, but I did have to take them for almost a week after my lap surgery. I actually thought that recovery was much worse.

    I think there’s a couple things to keep in mind here: one, you’re not their average patient and the guidelines they are giving you now are for Joe Schmo who may or may not do what they tell him to do – you may be better faster than they are telling you. two, you need the surgery. it’s unpleasant but you’ll be better in the end for it and I am glad you caught everything before it got even worse.

    good luck – I’ll be praying for you.

  • Ugh, I’m so sorry, friend! This sucks, but you will get through it! Take it one day at a time and think about how much better you are going to feel because you are doing all of this. I will be thinking of you and if you ever need to talk or vent, or scream, let me know!

  • Elizabeth–I’m so sorry about all this! Can’t blame you at all for feeling overwhelmed. It just sucks. You WILL come out the other end stronger but I totally understand how it’s hard to see that right now. Sending you a big hug and wishing I could come down to help you!

  • OH my, I think I would feel pretty much the same as you if I was faced with surgery. Here’s hoping for a quicker recovery than anticipated and that you are well taken care of in the meantime.

    And while you are relaxing you can plan how to spend next year’s tax return on something fun!

  • Wow what a day! Hoping for a speedy recovery for you! Love the fly wheel shirt last month I traveled for work a lot and did not get my points!
    Good luck with the procedure.

  • Oh wow, I’m so sorry, this does sound way more serious than I thought as well. I completely understand what you mean with being in control and not asking for help. I’m the same way. It always feels like we are a burden, but real friends and loved ones won’t mind. They just want you to feel good. Hang in there, you will be able to run pain-free!!

  • Oh, girl, this is so cruddy, but looking to the future, hopefully the pain will lead to something much better and more functional in the future. You can do this! And you are so fortunate to have family there to help you out. And that paperwork is scary!

  • Oh hun I’m sitting here with my jaw on the floor! I am so glad that you are getting this taken care of now because it WILL make you a stronger better runner in the long run. Plus, in the grand scheme of things – 3 months is definitely a do-able break. You’ll be more than ready to get back to running and moving by then! Please keep us updated on progress (I’m sure you will).
    To answer your question, I bought a cruise to Grand Turk, St Thomas, Half Moon Cay, and San Juan with my tax return (for May)!

  • In the end, you will be so happy to have spent the money & taken the time off for your hip. I cried after leaving my foot surgery consultation too. My advice is to talk to your PT post op. you won’t be able to work out like you’re used to, but they can give you “homework” so you still get activity in & don’t get bored. Good luck!!

  • What a day! I bet you’re exhausted from all that paperwork. We got a tax refund and bought nothing exciting at all with it. We just paid bills. I have a lot of allergies to medications so taking pain pills makes me nervous because I’m afraid I’ll be allergic to it. I like doing everything myself and I always have (according to my parents) so I’d have a hard time having people stay with me and help me. See you in a couple of weeks!

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  • I just wanted to let you know that I’ll be thinking about you and praying for you tomorrow. I can’t imagine all the emotions you must be feeling, but I know after all this is said and done you will be stronger in so many ways. Don’t hesitate to let me know if there’s anything I can do to help you through the next 3 months. I mean that. Hang in there! You will be awesome! xoxo

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  • How are you feeling these days several years post-surgery? Was the surgery worth it? I’ve had a labral tear in my hip for 10 years and it’s over the last has two years has brought me a great deal of knee and hip pain to the point where I can only bike and have stopped running and have a hard time with prolonged sitting at work and pain while sleeping. Recently it’s been hard to mount my bike. I just found out this is due to calcification (repeat injury) on my femur from my labral tear. I want to run again and I want to feel like a thirty something rather than an eighty something year old. I would love your feedback.
    Sincerely an active gal wanting to do a half marathon,
    Claire

    • I think that it has been totally worth it. I wasn’t able to walk without pain and living like that in my early thirties seemed nuts. If the hip is causing the knee pain- it IS worth it so that you don’t damage your knee any more than you have. good luck!

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